Wide Open Spaces

So there are hundreds of things that I love about Austin. Here's a selection:

Happy Hour at Trudy's by Campus...
Ohh... real smiles are always the best :)


Charlie's a good friend- yay for there being at least one other single person in the group.


my oldest buddy, liz

(dont hate me for the close up :))

Tim and Liz. He's just so comfortable when he's around her...


Mount Bonnell. Hands Down one of my favorite things here in Austin. Somehow I learned about this place freshman year and started going when I needed to let go. I utilize the dog park more now, but it still holds that magical feeling for me...






This week has gone by so fast, just like the last. It seems like my time here is just rushing by me and I can't do anything about it. But this is a subject I have thoroughly exhausted.

Here's another topic- one that has recently come up from multiple people. I dont know how I do it, but somehow I attract people to me who- by one design or another- completely forfeit contact with me for an extended period of time, then randomly call me out of the blue.
Example #1: Strongarms John. In fact, if we hadn't accidentally had a class together I dont think we'd still be friends.
Example #2: Cindy. For someone who claimed I was the only person who ever got her, she sure doesnt answer the phone when I call- or call back. Just randomly today she text messages me and asks when I'm moving back to Dallas, she needs a roommate. I'm like- WHA? are you kidding me?

There are more- I just can't think of it right now- but here's my question: what is it about the people I attract to me/me that makes that ok? I mean- reliability is a key characteristic that I cherish in friendships, and yet- I dont seem to get it from my... lets call them satellite friends= not my closest friends, but those that are at one time or another good friends. I guess my real question is - why am I... expendable?... to these people? Why is it that someone can walk away from me and not look back for a good 6 months to a year when suddenly they're overwhelmed with the need to talk to me, their bestest best buddy. (people that do not know me well are excluded from this group- i mean, we are in college and I do not expect people I just met to force correspondence when they do not know me)

Anyways- I need to go to bed. I hope everyone is well!

Oh yeah....

Pictures from tonight :) Harry Potter #5

Waiting in line... thanks for getting there in time Dez :)


You're a weirdo.


I punch you. In ze face.


Gang's all here!!


Cedric Diggory in the hizzouse!


Charlie and I

Not My Ugly Side...

I didn't know I was going to feel like this. I knew that I loved this city- I guess I just never knew that I thrive off of it. The closer it comes time to moving back to Dallas, the more I feel like I'm leaving my home- a place I adore. a place where I have habits and favorites and memories that mean so much to me. I feel like I'm facing that moment in life where you know things are going to drastically change but you dont know if it's for better or worse. I feel like... I'm losing something. And yet, I know- realistically- it wouldn't be quite the same. Lots of my friends are graduating and leaving- but lots are staying, too.

Going to Harry Potter tonight was great. So was dinner with Darrell at Chili's. So was Bull Creek with Sara. So was Clementine with Brent. The summers that Laura, Jon, and I spent swimming at Red Bud. The best job I've ever had. The place where I really found out who I am. The farmer's market. UT. Driving around freshman year and finding deer running wild in the hills. Having Gabby come over and make me cook for her. Discovering my love of 80's music. The artsy feel. The liberal feel. The idealistic feel- the feel that people here still believe they can make a difference. When I look back at everything I've felt love towards in the past 4 years- 95% of it is all here. Just typing about it right now makes me feel like I'm going to cry.
I know there are good things about Dallas. I mean, there have to be- right? Just because the last year I spent (before college) there was the worst year of my life- doesn't mean its going to be horrible.

I can find good things. Somebody help me out- name good things about Dallas. Things I'll like. Anything. Really.

no matter the sex, I'm gonna name her rock and roll...

So I have a few plans in the works. I'll make a list that way I can keep them straight in my head.

1. When I finally get moved back to Dallas, I'm going to try and get a job with Nancy's dad at Quest Diagnostics- that way I'll have a lab position and I won't have to pay for EMT classes. But EMT classes are my back up with some menial job doing something I don't like but have to do for money.

2. I found someone in Dallas who gives Italian lessons... and I want to take them. She eve said that since I wanted to go to med school, she'd add a section on medical terminology. I think that's perfect. I also want to re-learn my Spanish.

3. Next year, maybe in May- assuming Jon and Laura do move to Boston this year- I will be going to Boston, MA to visit them. I've never been to Boston- or anywhere on the East Coast except for DC- so I'll hopefully get to experience Boston and the surrounding area. I'll enjoy that.

4. In two years- sometime in 2009 before I go to medical school, I want to go to Europe and Egypt. My mom wants to go as well and has agreed to help fund- and Nancy wants to guide us around Egypt. We have friends and family in Germany and there are so many places I would love to go. Mom can show me Italy, I'll show her northern Germany and together we will explore places like Barcelona, Paris (I can always go again :)), Prague, London, Cairo, Athens, etc.

That's all I can remember at the moment so... I'll let it be as is. Honestly, having goals like these actually helps me save money. It might also be that I'm starting to feel like a grown up, but I prefer to think that it's only because every time I go to spend money, I think of going to Europe and I change my mind. Let's hope that sticks with me for a while- I have student loans to pay back after all.

who needs shelter from the sun...

Today was one of the most beautiful days I've had in a while... actually, today was possibly better than any other day I've had this summer.

Sara and I went to Bull Creek dog park-

and it was the most beautiful thing. Since Red Bud is still completely underwater, I haven't been out in nature like I usually do in the summer. In fact, I honestly think that has a lot to do with why I've been so incredibly restless. Lately, I just couldn't get a grip on myself. I just wanted to pack up and leave- and not just go back to Dallas but actually leave- go to a city I've never been, spend time somewhere new, meet new people, try new things... luckily I feel a little better after today- it's funny how the little things can calm your soul.

So- back to today- we went to the dog park. I honestly thought we would just stay for a little while, let the dogs play. No. We were there for HOURS and we went swimming- even though I didnt bring a bathing suit :) I went in fully clothed and it was wonderful.
My favorite part was when we went down to where the rapids were. I wedged myself by a rock and just let the water pour over me. It was like being touched all over. Here's my theory: I've been single forever and because of this- I'm actually not touched as much as some. I know this sounds weird- but I know people need to be touched- not sensually or erotically- just simply touched. The water today- rushing over me- I swear I started to feel better just sitting there.
Of course, I do love the water so that might have had something to do with it, too. It was just such a great experience today. The dogs had a blast and Sara and I had a great time- splashing and playing. It was fun. oh- but i got a horrible sunburn. damn white skin.

Then, to add to my wonderful day, Darrell and I went out to eat at Chili's and I don't think I've laughed that much at a meal in a long time. The waiter was great and I really got to enjoy Darrell's company. Now, the laughing might have had something to do with the fact that I had a rather large margarita- but I really was just in a great mood and I had a great time. I'm gonna miss this.

Leaving this city breaks my heart. I love it here. I love the farmers market, my friends, the amazing parks, the liberal feel, the fact that people are so health conscious and politically active... I mean- it's just amazing here. I honestly think I will cry the day I have to leave this place. Hopefully I'll find my groove in Dallas again. I'm honestly just afraid that I'll regress and turn back into someone that I left in Dallas years ago. ugh.